On Love and Equality
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Love, freedom and free speech
Republicans in Florida and Texas are passing laws to limit or ban how gender and sexuality are referenced in schools. While there can certainly be legitimate debates about how to tackle age-appropriate concepts in the classroom, many of these efforts are more political than pedagogical. They try to scare parents and find a “wedge” issue to crack down on what has been a march towards more understanding and acceptance of LGBTQ rights in general.
History can be instructive, here, because developments that may seem new or “out there” to some people can look pretty tame over time. Which brings me to Harvey Fierstein.
The Tony Award-winning actor is known in arts circles for his iconic Broadway and movie roles. At 70, he built a career as an “out” gay artist back when that was controversial. He also wore women’s clothing at times, for roles, activism and life, at a time when that was far less common in public life.
Fierstein reflects on all of it in a new memoir, and has a keen eye for the culture and politics at play here.
“Every single antique dealer in the world will tell you how to become rich,” he says. “Sell people back their childhoods.”
Night of the living dead
He ties that to the political nostalgia in a slogan like “Make America Great Again,” (which Trump stole from Reagan, himself an actor attempting to harken back to a John Wayne-type of attitude).
“Those people [in the MAGA hats] look like ‘night of the living dead,’” he says, “They look like skeletons in red hats!”
“Please love me for my uniqueness”
We discussed this landscape in a recent interview, and Fierstein talked about how the very mood and “goals” of equal rights have evolved from the time that he felt gay Americans were trying to prove they could be “the same” as everyone else:
“My childhood, we grew up with this brotherhood idea… that we’re all the same. And it’s not true! We’re all completely different. We’re all magnificently unique. And why don’t we appreciate each other for that? Why can’t I say, ‘I love you for your uniqueness, please love me for my uniqueness?’”
That’s deep. And inspiring.
It circles back to the GOP crackdowns on even discussing differences, because that framework tries to assert a “sameness” that many people don’t feel.
When there is more freedom and less stigma, most societies find a wider range of activities and identities than when people were pushed (or forced) to constantly conform.
In one generation, that may have been most visible through people’s “sex and romance”—America’s gay rights progress evolved within a wider “sexual revolution” upending most of society—in another generation, it may arise more in how people want to identify themselves, if at all.
Think differently
Fierstein is such a thoughtful, empathic and witty communicator, he also gets the last word today:
“No two people are exactly alike. We’re the ‘snowflakes’—as they already call us. We need the people who think differently. We need the people who will open the door for tomorrow, and I love change. Scares the heck out of me, but I love it, because we only get better and better—unless you’re Putin!”
P.S. We aired part of my Harvey Fierstein interview on The Beat, but it was taped from a longer discussion, which we are now publishing for anyone who wants to see the whole thing. Here’s a link to that full interview:
What a wonderful and loving man Harvey is, we need more people like him in this world. Your interaction with him was so natural and funny. Especially your wink!!! His uniqueness is what makes him so special and so loved by his fans. From musical theatre to movies, Harvey's performances are always award worthy. Thanks Ari, always grateful for all you do for us. Have a great weekend!!!🙏🎹🎤🎼👍
I would add that Harvey is also brave. He’s willing to be authentic and unique. I agree with about the selling of our past the nostalgia of a better time. The truth is it was only better for some. I think democracies have to work for everyone not just a select few. I don’t have a problem when people don’t understand others who love differently. Binary metrics for humans fall short. I object to criminalizing how people love. I work with many who are transitioning and it is complicated and filled with peril and now practically illegal in some areas. These new laws are cruel and wholly inaccurate. It was a thoughtful interview and I appreciate his perspective.